Running an anonymous advice box on your link

Some people are the friend everyone goes to with their problems. An anonymous advice box lets people ask you things they'd never ask to your face: about relationships, school, work, family, or just life. It's one of the most rewarding ways to use a link, and it comes with some responsibility.

Setting it up

In Settings, under Link, turn on the Advice box mode. Visitors will see the prompt "Tell me a problem and I'll give advice". You can leave other modes on too, or make the advice box the only one so your link is clearly for that.

When you share it, say what you're good at:

• "Advice box is open. Relationships, uni, and what to say in awkward texts."
• "Got a problem? I'll answer the most common ones on my story, names hidden."
• "Ask me anything about starting a business. I've made all the mistakes already."

How to give good advice

1. Read it twice. People often bury the real question at the end.
2. Ask before you answer. You can reply privately in the conversation: "Is this about a friend or a partner?" A clarifying question often helps more than a quick answer.
3. Be honest, and kind. Tell them what you think, not just what they want to hear, but say it the way you'd want to hear it.
4. Offer options, not orders. "You could talk to them, or give it a week and see" respects that it's their life.
5. Share your own experience when it's relevant. "When this happened to me…" is often more helpful than general advice.
6. Admit when you don't know. "I haven't been through this, but here's what I'd think about" is better than bluffing.

Answering in public

Sharing a question and your answer to your story helps everyone who has the same problem but didn't ask. Do it carefully:

• Ask yourself if the person could be recognised. Names, places, events and even how someone writes can give them away. The share screen lets you hide any letter of the message before posting.
• Leave out anything personal or painful. Some questions are only for a private reply.
• Summarise instead of copying when the details aren't the point: "Someone asked how to tell a friend they're hurt…"

Sharing a message to your story explains the share options.

When it's more than advice

Sometimes a message isn't a problem to solve but a person in trouble: someone who's being hurt, who's thinking about hurting themselves, or who's in danger. You're not expected to be a counsellor. What you can do:

• Reply privately, kindly and without judgement.
• Encourage them to talk to someone they trust in person: a friend, family member, teacher, doctor or counsellor.
• Point them to a local helpline or emergency services if they might be in danger.
• Never share that message publicly.

If you believe someone is in immediate danger, report the conversation so it can be reviewed. Where we believe someone is in serious danger, we may contact the relevant authorities.

Looking after yourself

Hearing other people's problems can be heavy. It's fine to take breaks: pause your link and nobody can send new messages until you resume it. It's fine to not answer every question. And it's fine to delete a message that isn't a real question at all.